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Carpe Laximentum — Seize the Slack

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Item: Bloomington Premiere
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Massive Tool
We thought it was blatantly obvious that this guy was stroking a dildo, not a real penis. But the TV station didn't see it that way...

Tree Rex
Title frame for "Tree Rex."

B Reads
B reads "To the Graduating Class."

Zima Slimeball
Victim of a clever Internet parody, J mixes up a Zima Slimeball.

Pauline & Xy
Xy's own grandmother didn't think much of her homemade salsa.

XY IV
XY was a platinum blonde for about six months. Then her hair started breaking off.



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Today's date: 2026-09-03